


Make It All Okay

by dazzamre



Category: Actor RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-20
Updated: 2011-01-20
Packaged: 2017-10-14 22:17:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/154073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dazzamre/pseuds/dazzamre
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ewan has to choose.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Make It All Okay

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to madame_d for the beta. The title and quite a few lyrics lifted from REM’s "Make It All Okay" which inspired it. A little angsty, a lot short.

It wasn’t supposed to end the way it did.

Filming would end, and you’d go your separate ways. You’d see each other doing press and at premieres. And while it was understood that, technically, it was over that wouldn’t prevent the occasional fuck for "old time’s sake." You’d be mates, and no one would think twice about your affection towards each other. All in all, your life would return to normal. It would all be okay.

But it didn’t end the way it was supposed to end.

~*~*~*~

"Hayden, you can’t be serious."

You don’t really think that, but it’s your first reaction and the words are out before you can stop them. His eyes narrow dangerously, and maybe you would have been better off not saying anything. He shakes his head, not in negation, but in something akin to disappointment. The door closes quietly, and you're left alone with his words echoing in your head.

 _Pick. Choose. Make up your mind._

"Fucking prick! Of all the fucking nerve!" Despite your best attempt at indignation, the words fall flat.

You knew things were getting out of hand. You _know_ you're closer than you should be. It’s your fault. It should never have happened in the first place. You're the one who’s married. You're the one with kids. It was stupid to get involved with him...to fall in love with him.

~*~*~*~

"So that’s it?"

"Don’t sound so surprised, Ewan. It was your choice," he shrugs.

"Hayden, I can’t just..."

You're angry with him now. Angry at what he’s asking you to do. Angry that _he_ doesn’t really seem that upset that you’ve refused. Angry that he’s put you in this position, and angry that you’ve allowed it to happen.

You _don’t_ have a choice. There’s only one way to go, and fuck him if he can’t understand that. Why he’s suddenly hugging you, you don’t know. You would push him away, but you're using all your effort not to melt into the embrace.

"We don’t have a prayer between us," he whispers against your ear. He’s so quiet, you think for a moment you may have imagined it.

When he finally lets go, he smiles at you sadly, and then he’s gone.

~*~*~*~

By the time the movie premieres, you're over him. You don’t wake up dreaming about him at night. You don’t search for something to hold onto to help you make it through the day. You don’t _need_ him anymore.

When his lips brush against yours, you wonder if you ever really believed that.

Later, when you're able to steal a few uninterrupted moments with him, it all comes flooding back, and you're not sure how you ever let him go. He murmurs about starting over in your ear, and you hold him tight, assuring him with hushed promises that you’ll make it all okay. You don’t know if you can really do that, but he’s offering you the heavens. You can’t turn away; not again.


End file.
